This one is dedicated to the ones that we were naive enough to have trust with our hearts, Those that we planned our entire lives with and now we find ourselves re-drawing our blue prints.
I remember nights that i would not be able to sleep until i hear your voice, I would not sleep until i made sure that we went over the plans for our future over and over again. Even though i knew the plans by heart i just loved hearing them come out of your mouth. I remember the random text messages and cute little jokes. The “I hope you are having a great day? ” “Did you eat?” ” I miss you” “did you dream about me?” and so on. I honestly could never picture myself with anyone but you. You were the reason i would randomly smile throughout the day, you were my muse and I thought I was yours, and as long as me+ you= us, Everything was definitely going to be fine.
LETS ALL TAKE A MOMENT TO TAKE THAT IN.
Then all of a sudden you went from being a Lover to a teacher and the lessons I learned are as follows:
- PEOPLE LIE
- No one can make you as happy as you can make yourself.
- No matter how much you love and trust be careful.
- Always have a plan for you, because plans with others changes all the time.
- Sometimes you are not going to be enough for someone else but that is okay just be enough for you.
- You can never truly know how someone else really feels.
- Pray and Protect your heart.
Loving in this generation is harder than being legitimately successful, As if that isn’t hard enough, loving a Nigerian man is like taking a walk through the jungle at night and hoping to make it out alive. I mean miracles do happen but not in this case (My blog, My opinion….Relax ). I am neither hurt nor am i upset, I just call it like I see it. Living in the United States and wanting to date someone from my culture, someone that speaks the same language as me has been extremely hard, not because there aren’t any out there, but because they abuse the power of how much they are wanted. In the United States Being married with kids is not enough to stop a typical Nigerian guy from having a serious relationship with 3 other different girls and have the audacity to be angry when the girls decide to get even or move on to something much better. I can write on for days on the amount of BS that i personally have experienced or have had to watch my friends go through as well, all because of someone else’s selfishness. They sit in groups like females at the hair salon discussing what girl can turn backwards and do flips and what girl is not worth the energy. The ones in other countries that we run to just for the sake of being with someone from the culture aren’t any better either or sometimes even much worse.
But, let me just quietly move on to my point.
Love is hard but it doesn’t have to be. Truth is, We know them by their behaviors and by the little lies they tell. Its either we turn a blind eye to the excuses and pretend that everything is all peachy or we simply do not entertain the Bull Shit. You do not have to settle for the guys who text you when they are bored or a guy that feels like they have to just so they can continue to receive their benefits. You do not have to settle for anyone that treats you like you are number 2 ( you should be the only choice) . You do not have to settle for anything less than you deserve or for anyone who feels like they have to check in with you or force a relationship that they do not want, simply because you have something they are after. YOU HAVE VALUE. Do not let someone that is weak or not human enough devalue you. Everyone is after one thing or another, Protect your jewels. Love is a beautiful thing but do not let it make you a victim.
Know your worth, Know the difference between what you are getting and what you deserve.
Look who join the Team
Editor- Ms Phabulous 🙂